Issue:Things to hear

I think that one of the most amazing things in the world is to hear your friends talk about traveling right after they've come home. It is a truly wonderful thing to listen to their stories and see the excitement in their eyes. It is something that I always hear from my friends.

I think that one of the saddest things in the world is to listen to your friends talk about how they have been hurting and knowing that there is nothing you can do for them but listen. I have two friends right now that are in especially hard times, and at least a couple more that are having tough times. It stinks. I love my friends, and I just want them to all be happy. =( But I thank God that they will all get through their struggles eventually and will hopefully be better in the end because of them.

Candy she is one of my friends I 've known her for 5 yrs, but her parents not get along well for yrs, and it did really hurts her. Anyway I always try my best to help her, and hope she will be stronger.

Wow~

Today I woke up at 10 am and read the newspaper..WOW.....it's 2009 now. The new beginning is waiting for me to learn more, right? And after two weeks, there comes the Chinese New Year. How busy it is in Jan. However, I am thinking about what should I do in this winter vacation...um....firt I will learn how to drive the car. Because I learn that it is really convenient to go out with car not bus. Sometimes I force to go home before the last bus or MRT. It quite disappointed me.REALLY.

ok this weekend I have so many things to do, because final is coming. Cram school still~
Seems like 2008 and 2009 or even 20010 will be all the same to me..haha~~

step by step

Life isn't at all that simple for me lately. I've been stressing a lot, thinking too much, and burrying myself in a hole that shows no way out. Sometimes I feel as if all is useless. Sometimes I believe that things'll never change. Other times, I just want to give up!
It's true though, that when I see the the results of my hard work, I feel happy, satisfied, and accomplished. But if and when I come across an obstacle and already make up my mind that I can't overcome it, things get bad. I see no way out. I see only the unreal and negative sides of me. I don't see what I have succeeded in doing so far, but only how much further I have to go. From the very beginning, I acknowledged and accepted that there would be hardships, that it would be a life long journey.

2009

Besides writing this blog... I'm merely sitting at my desk here, listening to music. I like things simple. The simplest of things excite me; they make me happy. It's why my life is so wonderful! All the little things mean everything to me. Finding a new music CD provides hours of entertainment. Listening online is like the greatest time ever. I don't ask or need much to lead a fulfilling life. I wish more people understood that.

Tonight I just went to Dinner with my dear WENDIE the girl who I always play and talk with no matter here or in Aus. um~what's more?We like to talk the good old days and all the funniest things. SO I didn't go out for celebrating the New Year but watch TV for 2 hrs. And keep working on my assignment.....However..Cram school tomorrow

HAPPY　NEW YEAR

GONE.....

Life is sometimes beautiful and struggle...No matter how hard you try to under your control but you still cannot predict the result surely. Life might bring you a lots of unforgettable memories but might takes away the stuffs or people you love. Two of my grandfathers have been passed away in this year. There are many of my friends came back to Taiwan. People are passing by from my life ....They might really meaningful to me or some of them just like the passenger in my life. When I gradually grow up, I realize my life that is not always wonderful like fairy tale..When I became closer with my grandmother at same time I lost my grandpa. I couldn't find the answer of the meaningful of life..and I couldn't control what it will be happened next moment. Everyone's life is like a story and he has his own story own memories..
Now I just want to tell my parents my elder sis and bro that how much I love them. I am really lucky to be the one in this family.And because of them, my life has became meaningful...

Issue:Girls talk

To all girls in a heart break. Because the one you love is with somebody else. And you are waiting on the side line, don't waste your time. Don't hurt yourself like this, you can do way better. If he really did love you, he would make you his number one priority. And wouldn't even be with another girl, right after you guys broke up. At this moment, you think its the end of the world, its not. What brings you down, can only make you stronger.

You may have had good memories with him, but you can always make new memories with someone else. Don't let him drag you around everywhere, like a little puppet. Following his every need. He may make you feel like your the only on in his world, but he's just fooling around with you.You may feel as if you'll never be able to move on, but trust me, you will. Don't beat yourself up, crying over him, he isn't worth it. Don't let his words get to you anymore. He may tell you he still has feelings, he may tell you he still wants to get back, and he may tell you to wait. Don't be the rebound... Yes he may be your "first love" but you'll make new love on the way. Build a stronger relationship then you once had. It's normal to think of him constantly, and crying over him once in awhile.

Your feelings with start to fade away, it won't go away all at once. It may take months or even years. But there are always other guys that can treat you way better. Though they may not have the qualities of your last ex..just remember, they can always treat you better. His promises will mean nothing to you, soon as you find someone else that can treat you better.

I want....BREAK...

I think waking up and doing what I'm supposed to do in the morning makes me in a good mood for the rest of the day. At least that's what happened almost when I am home. hahha. Except for the fact that I am in the dorm.Nothing exciting happened today at all. It was just a basic day. But I'm waiting for going my sweet sweet home tomorrow. I can't can't can't wait. I had therapy today and Wendie seems really worried about me. I'm worried about me too.I don't belong in this kind of environment, I'm too sensitive and sick of going through the same disgusting routine everyday. However, I think I'll go do my homework. I just want to have a real long break for the real relax....haha~~I really don't know why many people can enjoy thier university life so much....But on the other hand....I did really grow up in these years..

Busy day

Today definitely could not be any longer and busier what a nutty day. I woke up at 7 this morning! yeah I was flipping out and I didnt want to go to class in the worst way but I actually got to school on time. I just grow to hate that more and more everyday. Last night I was busy on my essay nothing exciting but it was nice to meet the end of semester. YAAA Cool and the New Year is on the corner then it's time for me to go home again and still work on all my assignment. WHAT A SURPRISE. Then after that I still have to go to cram school on Jan.1..What a pitty girl I am. But I did really learn a lot in 2008. However new start new beginning ...NEW ME...Hahaha

Assignment

Question1:
In my opinion, I think Chinese culture is more conservative than foreign society. Thus, the film in the past of Taiwan is not that open to show the homosexual relationship. The most common relationship in the drama or movie is the opposite sexual love. In Asia society, we don’t really like to show the different from others. Our society is still traditional and conservative to judge people’s behavior and moral concept. So we would like to see anything by traditional ways. Such like the drama or movie, we still like to have the opposite sex relationship in the plot instead of homosexual’s. Because most of the people in Taiwan still cannot accept this kind of different mold of love. We still have a really traditional concept deep in our mind. However, people gradually can accept the homosexual relationship and regard them as normal love. So now we can see a few homosexual movies or dramas have shown in Taiwan. Compared with foreign society, we indeed accept this difference slower than others. But at least, we can regard them as normal relationship.
Question 3
As we know, there are more and more people bravely to show their sexual orientation. When I walk on the street, the homosex can easily to be seen in Taipei. So that means they can feel free to show their physical affection without any fears. Every time when I see them, I don’t feel any different. Because it’s true love too, no one restrict people have to fall in love with the opposite sex. Of course there is no law to rule people which relationship is the correct way. Furthermore, people have the right to show their physical affection even it's different from most people. Love is not judge by sex, color or age. But true love is what we really want.No matter lesbian or gay, the relationship they have is true love. Thus, I don't feel any special about their relationship and most of the people can accept them too. So no matter both of lesbian or gay relationship they kiss on the street or have a real big hug that it is their right to show their loves to each other. Like opposite sex relationship they do the same way as them, so why do we have to use different standard to judge homosex relationship? So we should accept all the different love from all the different people

No matter your sex age or color, just love your own way and true heart.

Life

I was recently told by a friend of mine that she was looking up the meaning of life. Some people see this as something that humans cannot comprehend. But why is that, why is it that humans cannot say hey thats what life is all about. People around me say you work work and then you die basically. This world is full of people like this. That is NOT life. Now I'm not condoning for people to just get up and quit jobs but why do we work so hard and don't enjoy life? I see my family saying go to college graduate go to grad school graduate and then go to work then retire. They say that when your retire you can do all the things you want to do but in my honest opinion that is total and utter bullshit by the time your finally done working your whole time to old and tired to do anything your dreams have slipped through your fingers like grains of sand. You sit back and see how you wasted your youth doing NOTHING wasting all of our potential just to please the fuckers that call themselves your friends and families.

I'm 21yrs old NOW

I can't believe that I am 21 years old now. I still remember when I was 18, I can't wait to being adult. But now I really hope I could stop at this age this moment. Anyway thanks all my friends celebrate my birthday with me and all the best wishes.I really love you guys.

These days I feel so dizzy and I really can 't find the answer for it. But I should study more now, it's been a long time I haven't review my cram school's assignment. So it's time for me to move on right?

I can't wait for 12.31 comming.First, I can stay at home and enjoy the holiday. Second, I can see many singers on TV and follow the one I like the most just only change the channel. haha~~and I can't wait for the winter vacation also. I really want to have a holiday and I can take a rest instead of taking a lot of time on coming back from here to Taipei. Actually I am accounting the days last till the holiday every minutes. Just exaggerate the situation how much I want for holiday...I can't deny that I spend so much time on taking bus from home to Taipei Train Station. Even on weekend, I still have classes to go to.Therefore, I need a long break right? And what else, 12.23 is my 21 year- old birthday. Sigh~~I am really ADULT now and I hate of being old.

Comment of Harvey Milk

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0088275/usercomments-30

Stay at HOME

Soo many things I want to do on this moment. I want to eat kimchi,see my friends come back from AUS&NZ, see my lovely 2dogs and my elder brother. Sigh....I always feel sad about staying here, because I can't do anything at all. First, here is not Taipei,so I can't go out so easily and coveniently. Second, my home is in Taipei not here...So above those 2 reasons I really want to go home everyday. I always wonder why do I have home sick so bad??haha~~Because I feel soooooo comfortable to be home and there is always a girl called Lena (she is Philippine) that does evrything for me..haha~~Cool right? So I really addicted to stay at home. However, there are many people asking me where will I go on 12.31..and the answer is....STAYING AT HOME!! haha

Britney

Oh Britney
I'm sitting here watching Britney Spears:For the Record and I have to admit that I will always and forever love britney spears. When I was 15 she was like my hero!! and I still love her. And a comercial for her new concert just came on and I hella wanna go!!!But too far away... I know I'm crazy but it's BRITNEY SPEARS. No matter how crazy she was she will always be aweosme. I totally respect her for everything she has been through and how she is still ok you know?? I love her still. And she is always hot and sexy. Even when she was fat^^

My mom worries about me every second

I don't understand my mother. Not one bit. Don't get me wrong I love her to death but I don't understand her way of thinking. Maybe it's just one of things that I won't understand until I have kids of my own. I can't believe she always worries about me and tries to talk to me on the phone every second. I don't really want to tell her that I am safe in the school even I can't go to city easily. I think until I were 50, my mom still thinks that I am always a child. Again, I don't have child now, so I will never think of that way. However, I love my mom and also my dad(Sorry to put you behind mom) haha~~Anyway I will take care of myself and study hard^^

Life Flies By

Lately, at the end of almost every day, I feel like my life is just flying past by me so fast and that I never seize the moment to realize and make the most out of it. Everyday is the same routine over and over. Go to school, come home fall asleep, wake up at midnight, work on my homework, and get ready to go to school, get on the bus, go to school, and start all over again. Yea if you notice I have a irregular sleeping schedule for some reason.Lately everything has been so boring even though I keep telling myself that I live a fun life. I mean I've started playing tennis now and getting strong muscles in my legs.. But I dont think that's anything to really be happy about.
I've been staying up so late and this month has been so freaking crazy. Portfolios and tests and quizes and open responses. Like I'm soooooo burned out that my grades just keep dropping.SO IN CONCLUSION I CANT WAIT TILL WINTER BREAK BECAUSE I REALLY NEED IT. I wish I had that someone I can really talk to and tell me that everything will be okay, you know just someone to hug me and know that something is wrong without even asking and just be there for me.
I know my friends are here for me but, sometimes a guy at a time like this would just be great for stressful times like this. Too bad I'm single.

Issue :Sexiness

What makes you feel sexy?Is it the clothes, underwear, perfume/cologne you wear?The way you fix your hair?Muscles? Your shape? The way you Sing/Dance?When some one sweet talks to you?
I saw on the cover of a magazine the word SEX. So I guess it just made me wonder about what makes people feel sexy.People feel sexy in different ways.I'm not going to lie, I feel sexy sometimes.Sometimes it'll be because of the way I look.Sometimes it'll be because of the the way I dance.Sometimes it'll be because of the type of clothes I may wear.Sometimes it'll be because of the less clothes I wear. Ahah.Hormones can play a part in feeling sexy too. They can switch up your mood and make you feel really seductive.But weird enough, when other people compliment how hot I may look,it's sort of a turn off for me and makes me feel less sexy. It's because I know there are so many fake people out there who are willing to lie to just make you feel good or get something out of you, or they just don't want to hurt your feelings and tell you that you look BUSTED!
However, that's only when strangers tell me that because I know my family are straight up blunt with me and my friends will even be honest to me and tell me that I don't even match some days lol.

Ashley

After school today, I hung out with Ashley. It was fun. I bought her some mcdonalds and then we chilled at her house. We talked, we laughed, we did homework together [thanks for the help Ashley!] and we even helped her look for scholarships and what not. Lol you're probably thinking wow, such nerds, but all well, I dont really care, we still had fun just hanging out with each other. We haven't done so in forever! She is one of the few that I can spill most of my secrets to with a shoulder to cry on. Hopefully I can make it to her Christmas party. It would be so much fun! Now I just got back and I'm at home. Such a depressing and uneasy place to be. I'm so lonely here and bored out of my mind. My bed is the only comfortable place I can lay and just feel somewhat relaxed. So I guess I'm just going to change my clothes and lay in my bed; mMmmm cozy. =_= zZzZz

I'm Freaking OUT Man~

So there was an incident that happened to me today at school. It was really scary. I never thought of myself as superwoman and being invincible from everything, but I always thought of myself being a pretty healthy person that wouldn't get seriously ill/sick. It happened so suddenly and I was freaking out because I didn't know what the hell was going on with my body. I've told my boy friend and my best friend and they say it could be diabetes. O Kayyy? WTF? That's pretty scary for me and to be honest I think they could possibly be right because everything that happened to me, were the same exact stuff that happened to my other best friend. She went to the hospital to get it checked out and they said she had low blood sugar levels and her little brother has the same problems too and he has diabetes too! I'm so scared. I have to get a physical soon for joining track and field, so I'll just have to ask my doctor about it.... I'm stressing out now and this isn't good before my 21 birthday.

Who am I ?

I dream to be somewhere else. If I could fly. If I could fly fast ,I would do anything to be there right now.I think I just ran out of happiness...that optimism from days ago just vanished.I'm tired of smiling because everyone smiles tired of talking for the sake of doing. So tired of being so pretentious...who knows. Maybe this is just who I am. I used to have a life...I used to be myself. Now I don't even know who I really am...Feels like I'm the creation of people around me.I am whoever they want me to be...
lack of identity...?

Harvey Milk

After watching this video, I think we should be rational and ponderthis issue. Sometimes we have different opinions with others that weshould respect the differences and learn from it. Because violencecan't not solve the problem at all. In this case, the killer might hasa bias of Harvey Milk's sexual orientation. However, we can learn thatHarvey Milk is a really open minded and successful supervisor. I think we should really learn how to respent other's differences. Things not always go our ways,so we should learn from it. No matter the color,social position or sex, we should respect all the different people's different opinion. However, we would never learn from others and just in our own small worlds. Sometimes we should listen other people's opinion and suggestion. Because all the decision we make which the outcoming is not always the correct. Learning is the important job that we have to do every day. Even you were old or had many experinces which you still might have wrong concept. Thus people who use the volient to solve any problem is not allow in any countries.

How come?

I realize that you had kept my MSG for so long when Shawn told me just before. I can’t believe that how can you still keep it in your cell phone. But it has been more than a year I haven’t kept in touch with you and now you are in the military…..I really miss you and want to get you back but….I don’t know should I do this or not. I always wonder if I were still in BNE what would my life be? I bet it will be definitely better than my life I have now. Actually I can’t wait to go abroad for long term studying, because I can enjoy my life there and I can feel free to do anything instead of staying here and doing nothing. Anyway Bong…I did really hope that I can meet you again and talk until next morning like good old days……

It's times like these I really wonder why I wasn't enough. Why you had to have more, something I couldn't give you. Something I couldn't be.I hate when people smoke and they don't inhale. You're not cool, people don't like you more, and you're pissing away your money. Way to go, buddy.Bemusing enough, the way I treat people. Why do they stand for it? What joy can that possibly bring? Being talked down to isn't enough? What else do I have to do for you to get the hint?Why do you come back all of a sudden? Make me think of us, make me think of what went wrong. I don't like remorse, I don't like knowing I was a fool and couldn't see the truth. Please... just disappear again.Maybe I should learn to live life at the age I am, not worrying about what's to come.

RELAX DAY

Today is a new day and I’m glad because Saturdays are my days to relax. I woke up just a few minutes ago with the pain from the week’s activities. I’m not rushing to get up from my bed at all because once I get up I know that my father will have a number of chores for me to do.
I am so ready for my mom to come back home. She has the ability to do a billion things at once and still have a smile on. We are trying to take a little stress off of her because she hasn’t been doing to good. Her dad, my papa is in the hospital right now and she has been taking it really hard. She is with him right now and I hope everything is going well so keep her in your prayers everyone please.
On a happier note, I get to bond with my brother, sister, and daddy. I am really close with my mother so it’s nice to get that same relationship with them too. Today we are going out to have lunch and hang out. I don’t know how that is going to turn out but hopefully all will be fun.

To Janice & Kennis

I really want to say thank you to Janice. First, we always study together, eat together sometimes exercise together. I appreciate that she always there for me and help me for many things. I would like to answer her question when she confused with English. I don’t feel how silly the question is and I feel glad that I can help her out. However, I don’t feel shamed to ask her question, because I know that we learn together and become better together. She works so hard on studying and achieves her goal. Also Kennis is really a nice girl and always gives me a hand when I need it. She always works out with Janice and me. I can’t describe how nice both two people I met in CHU in words. I am really LUCKY ….really….Thanks Kennis always let me bother you and Janice …..I always laugh Really Loudly…..haha~~AGAIN….THANK　YOU GIRLS ALWAYS BY MY SIDE…